Late night

I am sitting here at the computer as I do most nights now. Travis is at work and the kids are sleeping soundly. It's probably mostly out of boredom, but tonight it is loneliness. So in my melancholy mood I decided to blog. Maybe not the best idea...
Today was a hard day. I saw someone from my past that I probably hadn't seen in twenty years. I asked  a direct question and I was totally ignored. I haven't changed that much. And we were at church, so I would have thought that the fact that our lives have changed so much for the good, it could have been something to rejoice over! So I guess that it hurt my ego a little.
I pulled into Target yesterday, and got the worst cussing I have ever received. And it was totally some chick, pulling through into a parking spot that I was going into, she was lucky she didn't get creamed! It is still bothering me.
There is a lot stuff going on with friends right now that weighs down my heart. Sickness, busyness, drug addiction, bad relationships, strained family relations... it seems to be all around. I suppose it always is. There is never an end to our prayer list. But I think sometimes it is closer to us than other times. I don't feel like I have anyone to talk to. BINGO The root of it all.

But tomorrow is a new day and a new school day. The Lord's mercies are new every morning. I pray that tomorrow will bring a day filled with the Lord's grace, blessing and HEALING for all the friends and family that I love.

Update on Life as we Know it!

I have been hoping for long time, to actually start blogging again. I naively thought that with homeschooling I would have time for it. We are almost half way through our year (we started early) and well I wanted to blog our whole experience. Luke and I have had to find our groove. And well... to say that has happened might be overstated a little. We decided to homeschool Luke his 3rd grade year for several reasons.  His age played a huge role, we wanted to see if we could do this at a young age, but no so young that his behavior would be an issue constantly. (how did that work out???)  We have organized sports to participate in outside of school. That is a huge thing for me. I want my kids as active and social as possible. It is going well I think. We have a homeschool group, HSN, that provides plenty of outside the home activities for us to attend. A once a week school day and then plenty of field trips and other activities. So as usual the phrase "home" school, is anything but. As parents, we realize that all moments of their little lives are teachable moments. My kids are out in the "real world" learning and growing, but the best part is that I get to watch and learn right along with them. Luke is a great student. I definitely know the areas of study he likes and the ones he doesn't. Math was one of his favs and now it is getting hard for him.  Luke is soo creative he loves to draw and play the piano. And what a mind for memorization.
A shocker for me has been Lilly Kate. She is so ready to read. If she was the first born and I had time to give her 24/7 undivided attention, she probably would be! She is so smart. And so eager to learn. So fun. She know her alphabet and which ones are vowels. She can count to a 100 with a little help, not much, and if she is looking at the numbers. She also loves to color and be creative. She has such a sweet heart. Having and teaching a little girl is so fun and different. I love being a "boy mom" and kinda wondered how I could switch gears having a girl. It really is different. She has a maternal instinct that is there from birth that you bond with. She is caring and loving and loyal. She loves her babies and her doll house. Where Luke instincts were more activity driven and more athletic. Luke is very orderly and systematic. He has a great Love for God and his family. I love being with them to help them with their strengths and weaknesses. Something no one else on this planet could do as well. Thank you, Jesus, for this season in our lives.
As for Travis and I we are good. Travis is working nights, which is hard for all of us but especially for him. We are adjusting, but praying that a day shift will become available. He is going back to school, via the Internet. So in a sense, we are all homeschooling! I'm so proud of him.
I have recently had the doctor confirm that I have some health issues. I have always known that something wasn't right. But scared of  the alternatives I chose to delay going to the doctor, All that being said I have come to terms with it and now feel that my family needs me to do what is best for my health. We have been eating healthier and exercising. For me, I have been doing a low carb diet and doing some hormone therapy. I feel better than I have in years. seriously. So it has difinitely been a good thing.
That is a glimpse into our life right now. I hope to keep it up, as I always say and then get too busy to. Here are the latest pics of the kids Lilly Kate at dance and us in the school "room".

Happy Birthday Mom!

Just for you Mom, I posted a blog entry! I know that you have been wanting an update on the the kids. So for your birthday, (drum roll please.....) I decided to blog. I got the kids rounded up and tried to call to sing a birthday song to you, but the phone was busy busy with well wishers. I hope that your day was a grand one. maybe we can get it together tomorrow night! Love you!

Believe it or not!

I'm posting. I have to confess that I have been side-tracked there for a couple of months with the newness of Facebook and the Twilight series. Sad but true. And of course...LIFE. But I have finished the books and now I have my evenings free for other things like blogging. Life has been good. We are in the midst of Basketball right now and every game we have had has been at 8 on Saturday morning. Luke received his first black eye during his game and never said a word about it. Afterwards his coach just looked at him like "did he have that before?" Today it was just starting to turn purple so it should really be pretty for school in the morning. Lilly Kate is doing good. She has a birthday coming up. We are going to have a ladybug party. (which explains the new background-"like a ladybug") I hope that it helps me to remember that her birthday is right around the corner. She is talking a little more. Today as I was putting her down for a nap, she said nigh-nigh. And it excited her so much that she perked up and didn't want to lay down. Her whole face lit up and she kept on repeating it and giggling. It's almost like she doesn't trust her mouth to say the words so she doesn't even try.
We are good, no complaints, as they say. I hope that everyone else is doing well too!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

I have missed it all. Blogging has definitely taken a back seat to my family over the last couple of weeks. First Lilly Kate had the flu. Then of course she passed it on to me. So basically that took us up to Christmas and then the poor thing got sick with a sinus infection. Which took us up to the New Year. We would just get better in between times to go to a Christmas celebration and then home again to be sick. Of course now I do have her cold, but I think for the simple fact that I can blow it hasn't turned south for me yet. I had left the the bitterness of past holidays behind and I really started to enjoy the Christmas season. And although I had visions of Christmas cards and candy trays danced through my head, they just didn't come together. Over the next couple of days I will try to back blog our holidays. We did have a great holiday even through the yuck.

Fa la la la la la la la la

Once again the Lord has showed me "the error of my ways". Today as I am doing my route, listening to the radio, I was thinking through my to-do list. Quite frankly I have had a bad attitude. And if I am being honest with myself, it has been going on for years at Christmas time. I have tried to keep it hidden from everyone. I knew that it was stemmed from repressed feeling from the past. I wanted to think of myself as a "scrooge" and heaven forbid that anyone else would think that of me. But as Christmas approaches I cringe, and then it becomes stress, then fear and anxiety, and then bitterness. I procrastinate everything that has to be done and it all compounds.Finally after years of being overwhelmed by it all, I broke. Cari and I talked and although it helped to release that secret, I didn't let it go. She would tease me a little, razzing me with Ba-humbugs, but she prayed for me.

Today as I was listening to the radio, they were talking about Christmas candy and cookies. What their favorites were and recipes for forgotten favorites. It made me think of my mom and how she has always made Christmas candy and now (tomorrow actually) we are going to our 2nd annual Candy Makin' day. Where she is trying to pass the tradition down to us girls.

A 14 year old girl calls into the radio show and says that she is enjoying the "cookie talk" because she has never had "Christmas cookies". This is the first year that she has gotten to celebrate because her step father wouldn't allow their family to celebrate. She was sooo excited. The DJ's were listing off all the things that she needed to do this Christmas. She needed to have eggnog, drive through a lights display, ham for Christmas dinner, candy and cookies, She needed to peek into a package under the tree because all little kids try it at least once. She would just giggle and say okay, okay, as the list went on.

It worked, as I found myself overwhelmed in empathy, I started to tear up. God used that story to make me realize I didn't hate Christmas, I was just letting the commercially driven, financially inadequate, greedy selfish thoughts crowd out the wonderful things of Christmas.

So I went to buy Christmas cards. I wasn't going to send them out. But I think I've changed my mind.

Warming my heart

As I sit here freezing, I am opening some pictures that was just sent to me a few minutes ago. These were taken this summer, by Greg, Travis's boss. We went to Branson for Trav's company picnic. It was boiling hot that day. Here's the proof. Poor Lilly was dripping sweat from every pore. We all were. But it just isn't as cute on the rest of us. She is miserable in this first picture, but she is doing fairly well when it was time to eat.

Look at this shot of the drool. I don't think she could get any hotter. I think I can hear panting.

I'm pretty sure that she is trying to tell me that she would prefer the island weather.

There's my happy girl. Did someone say brisket?